THE SILICON VALLEY
SKREWTS
San Francisco Bay Area's only 7-time USQ Nationals Qualifier
ABOUT US
Our Story
Founded in 2010, the Skrewts are Northern California's first community quidditch team. While the faces of the Skrewts have changed over the years, our current roster features every kind of player: long time Skrewts, former college players looking for a new home, and even rookies to the sport. In spite of all these changes, one thing remains the same: we always work hard, volunteer like crazy, and have to fly to the across the country every year.
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What's even harder than qualifying US Quidditch Cup is paying for it. This year marks our 7th consecutive year playing at nationals and travel costs will take its toll on any team, especially one living in one of the most expensive regions of the country. We need your help getting there!
CARDS AGAINST QUIDDITCH
$25 for first deck.
$20 for second deck.
$15 for third deck.
$15 for fourth deck, etc.
Shipping included in all prices.
CARDS AGAINST QUIDDITCH
Get the original pack featuring cards like "Beating a little girl in the face", "The Kevin Oelze reunion tour", and "Face beats on a cold day."
CARDS AGAINST QUIDDITCH 2
The 2017 deck including all your favorite memories: "Australia winning World Cup", "Unfulfilled Indiegogo perks", and "Forcing Hamilton references into quidditch."
[NEW] CARDS AGAINST QUIDDITCH 3
This year's brand new collection of cards!
[NEW] CARDS AGAINST TOWELS
DO NOT BUY THIS
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A complete set of Cards Against Quidditch filled with absolutely nothing but towel memes. We cannot stress this enough: DO NOT BUY THIS. We're not nearly funny enough to make a full pack of towel jokes. At best, there will be about 3 quality cards in here. Stay away from this pack.
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(Minimum orders to print: 10; Otherwise you'll receive Cards Against Quidditch 3)
DONATION PERKS
Please specify your perk when you donate!
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If you have any questions, please feel free to e-mail skrewts.sv@gmail.com or message Silicon Valley Skrewts Quidditch on Facebook.
[$5] POSTCARD FROM ROUND ROCK
Want to hear about our adventures in Round Rock, Texas for nationals?
[$15] SCENT OF ST. QUIDDITCH CANDLES
Ever wondered what the Spirit of St. Quidditch would smell like? Get our home-made beeswax candles to find out!
[$20] BOARD (NEVER BORED) GAME NIGHT
YOU choose the night, YOU choose the games. Have a game no one will play with you? Here's your chance! Need 12 people for a game? We got you covered! We may even let you win if you play your cards right -- that's a board game pun.
[$20] SKREWTS CHEERING TEAM
Led by actual cheerleader Maddie Timm, the Skrewts Cheering Team will bring all the boys to the yard!
(Limit 2)
[$20] NATIONALS PHOTO SHOOT
Get some pro-fresh photos from our resident photographer, Shirley Lu! These can be taken at nationals of you or your team looking cool (or derpy). These can also be taken locally for portraiture, pet photos, etc!
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(Limit 3)
[$20] BLOGGING YOUR FEELS
Elizabeth Barcelos has a lot of feelings and blogging is her personalized, uncensored outlet. She's willing to share the secrets of blogging to a fan with $20 to spare.
[$20]Â FRANK MOVIE RECS
Frank Nolin watches the all the frank movies. To be frank, you'll get the Frank's frankest movie recommendations based on, frankly, your frank movie loves.
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(Limit 2)
[$20] GET IN GET OUT;Â Â GET IN-N-OUT
There are 2 things that Maddie Timm cannot live without - In and Out. Come on out to California and she will show you what it means to In'N'Out4Lyfe.
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(Limit 2; location restrictions apply)
[$20] THE E-B-G-B'S
If there's one thing Ham Cabusi is notknown for, it's singing. But he's willing to risk his reputation as EMT extraordinaire and serenade his heart out to one lucky (unlucky?) fan! We promise to record his efforts and put it up online for everyone to enjoy.
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(Limit 2)
[$35] GETTING HIGH WITH MARTIN
Martin Pyne loves to get high - high pointing, that is. He is in peak form for achieving the highest highs and is willing to share that experience!
(Limit 2; restrictions apply)
[$35] 'SHOP TIL YOU DROP
Every year, the Skrewts does secret santa-style trading cards and Rocio Salas is the driving force behind much of the creative content. Want help photoshopping your own, or someone else's, Nationals trading card?
Note: the 'shop jobs are not limited to trading cards.Â
(Limit 2; 2 'shop jobs per perk; 1 remaining)
[$35] MASTER OF THE DUNGEON
Sam Harris loves to be the dungeon master. For $35, he will DM a one-shot campaign (DnD, MaidRPG, etc) for you and a group of your friends.
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(Limit 2)
[$35] CONTOUR LIKE A PRO
Kyle Pickett is a magical human being and it's not because he's a published author nor because he can run in 4 inch stilettos. Kyle Pickett has mastered the art of contouring and for $35, you can too!
(Limit 2; only 1 remaining)
[$50] ESCAPE WITH SKREWTS
There are 2 things that the Skrewts are known for - playing board games and escaping escape rooms. Join the Skrewts in an escape experience you'll never forget!
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Note: we plan to visit some escape rooms in Austin while we're there!
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(Limit 1; price includes ticket to escape game; location restrictions apply)
[$500] KEVIN OELZE REUNION TOUR
You know you want Kevin Oelze to be rostered for Nationals. You know he really doesn't want this to happen.
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(Limit 1; a physical appearance is not guaranteed)
SOMETHING ELSE?
Have something else in mind that you don't see here? Shoot us a message and we'll try to make it happen!
